Babies. Gorgeous little butter-wouldn’t-melt babies. But beneath that irresistible veneer, babies have the comedy gold timing of a stand up comedian. They are little masters of Murphy’s Law, especially when it come to sleeping, puking and pooing. Here’s how:
Baby is sleeping. You leave the room like a silent ninja and run around the house getting must-do chores out of the way.
Chores done and dusted and baby still asleep? Do NOT even entertain the thought of putting the kettle on and resting your weary body. As soon as you lower yourself into a pose that resembles “ah, finally a spot of me time”, baby WILL wake up. I don’t know how they know, but they do.
The exception being, of course, if you have to be somewhere very important. Then they will decide to have THE BEST daytime sleep ever.
I’m sure babies can sense the best possible opportunity to cause maximum havoc with a well timed poop. Usually it’s when you are in a crazy rush; late for an appointment or the school run (see final point in sleeping above). Typically it’s after you have just changed their nappy and have strapped them into the car seat.
For added comedy timing it helps if the nappy leaks. Extra laughs if you have them in a super cute outfit that you wrestled them into for a specific purpose. Like, say, photographs. Excellent.
Similar to poop, but usually involves branding Mum with a large white baby badge instead. Always when you least want it to happen.
Mum doesn’t usually have time to change her own clothes because she’s running late thanks to Murphy’s master doing another explosive poop.
Typically she has to hastily employ the ‘rub and run’, smudging it in and hoping no one will notice. Joy.
What moments of Murphy’s Law have your babies treated you to?